Lessons From My Father

Someone somewhere once said "we are only a product of our environment!" With each passing year I like that statement a little bit more. I like it because it is a truthful statement! This past weekend my wife, son, and I went back home to see my nephew for the first time. It is the first child of my older brother and more than likely it will be his only one. This time with my brother and our sons left me very reflective for the rest of the day. I began to think about my childhood and the many different times throughout my life that my father has been absent. I thought of every important moment in my life and how my dad promised to be there, but never was. I realized how my brother and I have been given a great chance to break a family cycle that was started by our Father.

My dad will always be my dad and I do love him, but he really has not been a father to any of his three boys. So for all of us with our children we have the opportunity to set a new foundation that will last hopefully for generations to come. Being a Father means spending quality time with your children, loving them, helping them, teaching them, and guiding them through life. I realized this past weekend that the environment they grow up in will affect them for a long time. Perhaps their entire adulthood. One of the things that I began to notice was my Father's lack of morality. His morality was based on what he believed was and is right for himself. He had no foundation for a moral living except what he learned from the world. This type of thinking filtered down to all three of his boys. I never noticed my lack of integrity or morals until I became a Christian and at that moment in time my World-View was radically changed forever.

I reflected upon what I wanted for my son that I never received. I decided that I would never inundate him with heavy theological teachings or fill him full of doctrine (I will wait for that until the Jr. High years) I decided that I need to teach him about God in a practical way. For now it is praying together at night and right before he goes to bed. Although he is only 20 months old he clasps his hands together, bows his head, and closes his eyes, and we pray before I tuck him in at night. I realize that he will mimic me like my brothers and I mimicked our Father. My training him in the Lord will have to be more action than verbal for now, but he must be trained up in the ways of the Lord. "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4, NIV)." Christian Fathers have a great responsibility to give their children instruction in the Lord. What we do from the beginning of their lives will impact them and their children for generations to come. One day I hope my son will look back and smile because I was always there for him and because I taught him true morality and integrity based on God's Truth.